Do you feel like you have had friends who have adhered to the Shine Theory? What did that look like for you?. 
In chapter 4, they mention that “friendship has been the source of some of their biggest professional leaps.” How has friendship helped your professional career?.Have you ever been in a vulnerable position with a fairly new friend and wondered if they would run? Did they? What happened?.Have you been able to take on big things or leave things (work, people, situations) because your friends provide a safe place, safe base, and safe harbor?.What do you think about this? Do you think this applies to friendships? They discuss three things: being safe harbors for each, being safe bases for each other, and having a desire to see a lot of each other and know what is going on in each other’s lives. In chapter 3, there is discussion about whether attachment theory applies to friends.
Have you experienced this at any point in your friendships?
In chapter 2, the authors reference ‘creating a wavelength’ and focusing on their sameness in the early days of their friendship without acknowledging the differences that later ‘blindsided’ them. In chapter 1 (p16), they say “there is a popular belief that people age out of the desire to make friends.” Do you think this is true? Have your beliefs about this changed throughout your adult life?. In chapter 1 (p5), they say “We began the process of making each other into the people we are today.” How have some of your friends made you into the person you are today?. What are the origin stories for you and some of your friends? How do the retelling of the stories by some of your friends differ from yours? They say that friendship origin stories are just as important as romantic origin stories. 
In the first chapter, they talk about the ‘cute meet’ story. As you are reading the book and/or preparing for a conversation with friends, consider some of the following questions.įeel free to discuss your thoughts about the book in the Piloting Your Life (the book) Facebook group. Big Friendship is the first Piloting Your Life Bookclub book selection.
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